Remember when this was an acceptable pool float? LOL Showing up to a pool party with one of those busted yoga mats these days is like a dude breaking out a Samsung flip phone to get a girl’s number. Sure it can be endearing (ish?), but bottom line: NOPE. Just like mobile phones, workout classes, … Read more
Back in April/May, I decided that this was going to be ASHLEY’S SUMMER OF FUN. The first few months of the year were total shit not great for me personally and I didn’t take any vacations, so by the time June rolled around, I was so ready to GTFO of my depression town. To kick off my … Read more
There’s a cute little political movement happening amongst Trump-supporters/Anti-Hillary-crazies this week that has fully amused me and a lot of my (intelligent) friends: BOYCOTT STARBUCKS BECAUSE THEY SUPPORT HILLARY!!! I originally saw this OUTRAGE from one of my Facebook friends and decided to smear a steaming pile of sarcasm on the otherwise supportive comment thread (my since-deleted … Read more
In case you missed my 87-minute long Facebook Live announcement or haven’t perused my Instagram (read: dog and pizza gallery) in a while, I moved from Atlanta to THE BIG APPLE. And no, I don’t actually call it that because I’m not your dad or a midday talk show host (unfortunately). I moved to New … Read more
When I heard about our dictator President firing the person investigating him, then citing the absence of an investigation in the termination letter, my mind couldn’t help but draw breakup parallels. Can you imagine dumping someone because you were scared they might find out you’d been cheating…..and then when you dumped them, making sure to double … Read more
In a past life (read: up until 2015), Miami was a destination for some of my wildest times. One summer, we literally woke up like this: (For the record, that’s a patio…and a Bebe dress…and me drunkenly defying gravity. And my best friend next to me is married with a kid on the way.) But … Read more
Exactly one week before I was asked to go on a press trip to Aruba, I was going through a bit of a rough patch in my personal life and literally said to myself, “I need to go on a trip — like, an out-of-the-country trip.” AND VOILA, I got the invite! I felt very … Read more
My name is Ashley and I’m a recovering aggressive teeth brusher. This should come as no shock as I’m an aggressive driver, aggressive shopper, aggressive coffee drinker, aggressive Emoji user, aggressive Flywheeler…I mean, the list goes on and on. I’m really serious about my teeth (floss daily, have been using Tom’s toothpaste my ENTIRE LIFE) … Read more
Joy to the world! Merry Christmas! God rest ye’ merry gentlemen (and women)! This is the post that I guest blogged on The Pumpkin Spot (yes, awesome editor Becky let me spew my nonsense on her lovely site, which you should check out), so I figured I may as well post it up here, too. … Read more
You know the dilemma white girl problem: You have an important date/event/lingerie photo shoot within the next 12 hours and just realized you look like a member of the Cullen family…except you don’t have their disgustingly perfect looks to pull it off (no offense). If only there was a spray tan you could get and shower … Read more