Cover Your Pet’s Butthole with Jewels![FINALLY]

Call me crazy, but I have never been personally offended by the site of an animal’s asshole.

However, in 2022 in a world filled with bare human asses breaking the Internet, apparently this is an issue for some people. So praise Jesus for the TWINKLE TUSH, a feline ass-cessory that turns a kitty’s butthole into bling.

Now I know what you’re thinking — “Ew what happens when my sweet little Fluffy takes a shit, do I have to fish this jewel out of the litter box and clean it off?”

Yes.

Omg I was just kidding, you guys are gross. The TWINKLE TUSH hangs from the tail. But real quick, take a moment and think about what happens when you do anything to (read: lightly touch) a cat’s tail. Exactly, they claw your face off. So this is a genius idea.

But I can see this becoming a status symbol in the elitist cat community. Before you know it, people will be looking at unbedazzled cats like I look at Droid users.

kardashians-8086235
And I know what you dog owners are thinking, “Ohmygod cat people are so weird; dog people would never come up with weird shit like this.”

Think again. Rear Gear butt covers for pups have been selling out on Etsy since ’09.
buttcovers-3034890
Naturally their tagline is “No more Mr. Brown Eye.”

jimmy-fallon-ew-5133766
Now if only we could figure out a way to cover up those self-proclaimed “fitness models” on Instagram….

Nevermind, I got it.

img_9495-3427874
Bottoms up!

LYLAS,
Ashley